You may all be a bunch of shifty douchebags, but we at IDCAY would like to wish you a Happy Thanksgiving, and ask that you at least try to think about someone else other than yourself on this day of giving thanks…
Remember: there are no guarantees, so try to at least be grateful for the things you have, whilst simultaneously harboring a deep hatred for your friends, family, and colleagues, for all of the things you don’t have. Remember all of the turkeys, sweet potatoes, and cranberries that sacrificed their lives so that you might engorge yourself at dinner. Remember the Alamo and The Maine.
Happy Thanksgiving Assholes!